Here's the story:
Driving my '93 legacy wagon home from work about two months ago. Bone stock EJ22 running perfectly fine.
Take a hard left turn from a stop and shift into 2nd in the middle of said turn.
Car starts bogging and not responding to throttle input as if MAF is failing and I'm able to limp it home while engine runs progressively worse. No loud noise, no puff of smoke, no strange engine noises, no milkshake, engine and coolant level are fine
Go out to start in the morning, crank no start and sounds like bad compression.
First thing I do is check timing, all marks are perfect, belt isn't damaged, keyway didn't shear off, everything is business as usual.
Do a compression test:
Cyl 1 - 30PSI
Cyl 3 - 30PSI
Cyl 2 - 30 PSI
Cyl 4 - 30 PSI
Pull the engine, took both heads off. Headgaskets are perfect on both banks. Valves are clean and in great shape, no damage whatsoever.
Cylinder walls look great, pistons move freely and smoothly in the block.
From everything I (and every other tech worth their salt at my shop) see, this engine should run and run well. I can not for the life of me wrap my mind around an engine failure like this, ESPECIALLY an EJ22. These things are known for being bullet proof and this one has been. For a long time.
Any advice or some fresh perspective on something I may be missing would be very appreciated.