s'ko Posted April 7, 2004 Share Posted April 7, 2004 So here I am in the midst of working on a BRAT and my OBS and dating. Now things are going really well and I am looking to get engaged possibly on May 22nd. I am taking her off-roading at Hungry Valley and were doing a scavenger hunt So that really puts a damper on my plans to 1) make a Rubicon bashing BRAT and 2) make my OBS more outback rugged. :-\ How do some of you guys balance the two. BW Here's a pic of of us Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
calebz Posted April 7, 2004 Share Posted April 7, 2004 Its tough, and depends a lot on your other half.. mine really actively dislikes my car habit, so that makes it even harder.. just do the best you can Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Qman Posted April 7, 2004 Share Posted April 7, 2004 Well, it helps to have a better half that is understanding and patient. You've got it a little easier than some of us. We have wives, kids and other things to keep on an even keel. I guess the most important thing you can do is listen to the signals from her. She'll let you know when she thinks you're neglecting her. That's when you will have to sacrifice your time with the "projects" for the benefit of the relationship. It works with understanding from both sides. If she truly loves you she will take you with your hobbies as well. Good luck!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
All_talk Posted April 7, 2004 Share Posted April 7, 2004 Like you said yourself… its about balance. My wife isn’t particularly interested in any of my hobbies but she enjoys seeing me happy, so she pretty supportive. If you know your girl well you’ll know when you’ve been spending to much time under the soob and you’ll have to give a little. My general advice on marriage (I’ve been happily married for 15 years), if its important to you it should be important to her, and the other way around too. And be careful of little things you “think you can live with”, don’t expect people to change, if you have a problem with it now, chances are it will be a bigger problem down the road. Be honest with yourself and with her. If you think time/money management is tough now just wait tell you have kids. Gary Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MorganM Posted April 7, 2004 Share Posted April 7, 2004 It's simple math really. Subaru > Life Can't argue with math Seriously tho; I have a wife, son, career, and countless hobbies. Hard to find time for the Subaru. It sits for months on end. To me its just another hobby. I get to it when I have time, I have fun working on it and driving it when I can, and I put it away when I dont have time for it. What really helped was when I got another car. So now my wife has her daily driver, I have a reliable daily driver, and my Subaru is a toy. This makes it easier to 'put it on the shelf' when I simply do not have time for it. My wife laughs tho because the Subaru gets my stall in the garage while my brand new car sits outside... can you tell which car I like more? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sweet82 Posted April 7, 2004 Share Posted April 7, 2004 My wife was the one who sent the $ to Australia for the plans! I think she did it so she wouldn't have to drive it anymore:confused: She has been very supportive. If I'm out in the garage she has time to read! Wife, Family, Hobbies, life is a balancing act. Glenn, 82 Summer, up and running. 01 Forester, running. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thealleyboy Posted April 7, 2004 Share Posted April 7, 2004 S'KO: It's hard for someone not into cars to accept a hobby like wrenching - unless it is justifiable economically. Problem is Subes are economical AND reliable, and that's a bad combination. You just end up buying more Subes to satisfy your craving. In other words, if you are a Sube derelict that just enjoys wrenching on them, it's gonna be a tough sell. I don't know the answer. All I can say is that people always gravitate to their natural state of contentment, and if you are a derelict, you should make that known BEFORE taking the vow. Hopefully, she'll understand and accept you for who you are. If not, well you are gonna hafta give up something... good luck, John Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
s'ko Posted April 8, 2004 Author Share Posted April 8, 2004 Thanks for all of the input. I am trying to get her into some of the things that I do. She's been pretty supportive of my hockey playing and has made almost every game. She is also willing to go off-roading with me on the 22nd. I guess I will get interested in her hobbys, like ceramic doll collecting and what she finds is important, like dressing nice and looking groomed. I could also print out that "How to deal with subaru addiction" thread and give it to her. Also introduce her to the Subaru Widows board. BW Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PHATBRAT Posted April 8, 2004 Share Posted April 8, 2004 Yeah, Try to equal the time between her and your hobbies. You both need time to do your thing. And MORE importantly though is your family. Toys come and go. I try to play while my wife is away or when she wants to do her thing. Or sometimes, I will do my thing and call it a early night so that I can snuggle up on the couch for a good movie with her (win-win situation). There really is no right or wrong or definate rule. It will be different for every couple out there. You just gotta go with your gut feeling. You do not necessarily have to become interested in her hobbies, but you damn sure better listen when she wants to talk about them. 2 reasons. 1. It lets her know (or at least think) that you care and 2. when it comes time for her BDAY or when you want something you take care of her first. If you are out and spot a porcelain doll and have the extra $, buy it for her. That will win her over every time. (BUT, like I said, this is where paying attention to her comes into play. She may state to you at some point in time that she wants a specific doll and just can't seem to find it. Well, if you listened you will know it when you find it. Also, There are alot of cheap imitation porcelain dolls. You gotta learn from her what is good stuff and what is cheap trash) Just a quick word advice from The Bozzinator. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GLCraig Posted April 8, 2004 Share Posted April 8, 2004 well I have the other problem, I'm single and don't have a place to work on my Subarus Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
s'ko Posted April 9, 2004 Author Share Posted April 9, 2004 Well, I talk to a vendor that comes into work and I got a nice ring for 250 down and 97 bucks every paycheck for the next 8 paychecks. The cool thing is that he let me take the ring home with me I guess I can still justify spending $$ for my soobs cause I am getting ready for the off-roading trip So anyone in the Los Angeles area want to go wheeling and see me get engaged, MAY 22nd at HUNGRY VALLEY SVRA. Scavenger Hunt and other activities are in the works. Maybe a hill climbing contest or something like that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Myxalplyx Posted April 9, 2004 Share Posted April 9, 2004 Well, my wife absolutely HATES my XT6 almost as much as I do now. She has taken to the OBS after it served me well. Dunno what to say. There isn't any balance on my part. Luckily I work shift work so I have a lot of 'side time' I can invest into the car if need be. Well.....wifelady is ecstatic to see XT6 down for the count (low compression all cylinders). I told her I'm looking to get an even older Subaru (mid 80's turbo) and all the happy faces went away. As long as I take her shopping and a few of her other hobbies, she leaves me alone. The smart remarks about how 'unreliable' my scoobies have been (within the last year or so) will continue. Whateva! :-p Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
heartless Posted April 10, 2004 Share Posted April 10, 2004 s'ko - first, congrats on the pending engagement! Second, definitely send her to the widows board! she will be more than welcome and can rant, rave, and vent her frustrations there to her hearts content! Good luck on 5/22!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
s'ko Posted August 31, 2004 Author Share Posted August 31, 2004 Well... she said yes. here is the scoop. Told her I was going to WCSS6. (sorry for not making it) Went to Pismo beach and camped on the beach for two days thinking and praying. I found it does wonders for calming you down. Did some dune driving. Love the BRAT. Light and not enough power to get yourself dug in Came back to LA and asked her. She said yes. Good thing I didn't go to WCSS6 w/the BRAT. The fuel pump went out on me right as I was going to the engagement site. That's after driving 400 miles to Pismo and back and getting things ready for the engagement party. The best part it I took her to the PAP on Sunday to pull a fuel pump for the BRAT. she said "so this is guy world huh?" and I sorta chuckled and nodded. BW Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MorganM Posted August 31, 2004 Share Posted August 31, 2004 That's great man; congrats She'll even go IN the junkyards with you? DAMN! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
s'ko Posted August 31, 2004 Author Share Posted August 31, 2004 That's great man; congrats She'll even go IN the junkyards with you? DAMN! I think that this may be a one time deal. Probably not going to happen again. BW Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bajavwnsoobnut Posted August 31, 2004 Share Posted August 31, 2004 well everyone else has said everything I would say..... ...... but my wife is being slowly converted to subidom lol she even blames me that when she is doing something she starts thinking subie and CONGRATS s'ko Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
spanky_pete Posted August 31, 2004 Share Posted August 31, 2004 Congrats man, that's cool. My wife is very tolerant of my Subies. But, parts hunting would probably be where she draws the line. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mcbrat Posted August 31, 2004 Share Posted August 31, 2004 my wife went to the junkyard with me ONCE. She prefers not to go back Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Turbone Posted August 31, 2004 Share Posted August 31, 2004 Congrats from a guy thats got a wife who is almost as bad as me. I cant tell you what she had to deal with to go to WCSS6 (the ones there know). The trick is to get her a reliable Subaru thats her style. Keep it running well and she will let you do just about anything you want Soob related. A car is a real center point of everyones life, and if you have a addiction to a certain type then its even more pronounced. Women are very understanding, to a point. Just make sure you take of her needs also. I think I speak from experience, been married for 27yrs and still going strong. Morgan, I'm going to have to cry foul :-\ You said Subaru = Life. But then you say its just a hobby and you have other cars for daily drivers Redo your math.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MorganM Posted August 31, 2004 Share Posted August 31, 2004 Morgan, I'm going to have to cry foul :-\ You said Subaru = Life. But then you say its just a hobby and you have other cars for daily drivers Redo your math.... It was a joke? Ya know I wish I could depend on old Subarus as reliable transportation. I tried that, been there, and done that for years. Gets kinda old making repairs or mods in time to get to work the next day. If I'm going to work on my Subaru its gonna be something I want to do and when I have the time to enjoy doing it. I guess Subarus arent an addiction for me... just a hobby Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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